The Rise and Fall

(KN 2012)

WHAT GOES UP MUST COME DOWN.

So take care when you build others up. You're only giving them further to fall. No one is perfect. Eventually we will all take turns in some way or another at disappointing one another. It's only with healthy views and expectations that we keep the disappointment down to a minimum. Be open to forgiveness and more than anything give up some slack. We all need it:)

Falling Apart

Source: KN 2011

Sometimes Things Fall Apart.

Friendships fall apart. Love falls apart. Families, they fall apart too. Is it hopeless when this happens? Was it just how it was supposed to be? I think, regarding interpersonal relationships, just like anything ill-built it needs to fall apart for something good, solid and stable to be built in it's place. Any relationship you may have that falls apart is an example of something poorly built up in the first place. Whether through lies, betrayal, silence or even something as innocent as distance, some things just aren't meant to hold and these are the hints of that. I believe wholly that you have to let it fall apart and scatter just to get to the part where something awesome and stronger rises up. Allow yourself to move with grace through the pain of the moment and onward to the next phase of building. You've learned a lot from that last fall. Though you might still be hurting too much to see it yet. You know what you did last time that engaged the demise. Were you quiet about things that bothered you? Were you afraid of setting boundaries? Did you just not pick up the phone and call, those times you actually did think about it. Did things happen and happen and instead of calmly letting your feelings and thoughts be heard you chose to sever ties? It has to happen, if it happens at all.

After a good fall, when something you've been holding onto has released from your grasp and hit the floor, scattering, I suggest you remain hopeful. Don't get too bummed out. It'll pass. The only conscious part you really have to take in this is the building thereafter. The next time you see a relationship with someone leading a certain direction have the courage to speak up. If it's worth salvaging you have got to speak up. You have got to do your part whether by keeping in touch, setting boundaries or just letting your voice be heard about something, you've got to do it.

You have to save whats worth saving and let go of what isn't. This is your happiness we're talking about, afterall.

Let Down Your Guard

Source: Joy Russi 2011

"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be."

                                                                    ~Lao Tzu

I was on a Roller Coaster when I concluded that I am all too guarded. When the coaster climbed upwards I anticipated what was to come. I feared the drop, dreaded it. After the second climb and fall I told myself, I mean, I said it aloud: "Kelina, you just have to let go." And so I did...I became one of those people with arms raised. You know, the raised armed coaster riders you see and probably are yourself. I never was! I thought they were all crazy people. Until Christmas Eve. Then I started thinking about how being guarded and fearful, permeates your life. Always anticipating the next move, afraid of what might happen and if you have a mind like mine all sorts of horrible things can happen. Then you miss out on cool opportunities because ultimately you're a chicken shit. So, really, the only choice here is to let go. Let go and enjoy the ride. Throw your hands up in the air and smile and scream out a "Hell Yeah" because eventually you will die. But not right now. Right now, you're gonna fall and rise and rise and fall and shit will come your way but if you're happy and not big on holding on to negativity then I think, no...no I KNOW you're gonna be just fine.

We're all gonna be ok as long as we want to be ok.
Every single moment gives you an opportunity. You can enjoy it, making the most of it with arms and heart and mind and soul completely open....OR you can clinch up and close up and let is pass you by. And pass you by it will...but not for long...you have a pause to realize what the next opportunity will do for you. It can do so much--no, not just for introverted deep thinkers such as this gal, but for everyone! Get ready to surprise yourself. Once you pass through, unscathed, you'll want more and more and more.

Let down your guard. Let the awesome and amazing happen. Be a Badass.

They have more fun:)

Limitless

You're Only as Limited as You Think (keep telling yourself) You are.

It's a foolish notion to believe that you'll never "be anything" in life. For you already are!! You might not have a ton of money or the guy or gal you specifically thought you'd settle down with or whatever your direct hang-up is...but get over it! Life, is life. You have one and that's something pretty amazing. Yet it's so damn temporary that there just isn't enough time to sit and think about the "lack" for too long. It's time to move on and move up from what you keep learning about yourself and your existence.
You're breathing.
So Far, So Good.
~Onward.

Notes on Elimination Communication

When I first read about EC I was half way through my pregnancy. This being my second child I was aware of the many things I wanted to try that I hadn't before. Immediately, I was fascinated with the idea of a baby's ability to communicate his elimination needs and the parent's ability to respond effectively. My partner and I were already in agreement that I would quit my job and stay home to mother the baby and my oldest. This made the idea of consistency much easier than if I were working.

When our son was born I didn't think about ECing at all. I was just taking it all in. Nursing. Co-Bedding. I started cloth diapering him at a month old. It wasn't until at about 3 or 4 months that I started putting him on the toilet "just to see" what would happen. In many cases nothing would happened or I was just too late getting him there. My mistake in many of these situations was second guessing him.

At just before 5 months we were finally successful. When I say successful I don't just mean I got him on the pot in time. I mean, I understood what he was communicating. I knew he had to go, I didn't second guess, I got him there, cued him on what he was doing and praised him for doing so well. (I even praised myself a little too;)

Since then, we've kept it up with only two "accidents" in his diaper. Needless to say folks, I'm a certified believer. I've become so passionate about this. It definitely carries over into all aspects of my parenting journey. Listening with my heart to the needs of my children is easier than once thought. Putting that ol' Mother's Intuition into play at a constant is completely necessary in the foundation of this journey.

I totally encourage all new and experienced mamas to give it a try!!

Here are some notes on what I've observed to be useful and what I pay attention to:

• Don't second guess---if you think he's/she's about to go make your way to the pot. This will help them establish what they already know: it feels much better to poop or pee in something other than their diaper and on themselves. The key is giving them the option!
• Having a baby bottom sized pot seat is extremely useful/helpful if your baby is already sitting up on their own--but if not it's always easy just to hold them in between your thighs as you yourself sit on the pot.
• Baby wipes in the bathroom are a must!
• Giving cues like poo poo or pee pee will help synchronize with the urges they are feeling thus teaching them what exactly it is they are doing and where they should be doing it.
• Don't forget to praise!! Babies loved to be clapped for and cheered on no matter what they are doing---so feel free to let them know how proud of them you are!!
• And if at first you don't succeed, keep trying. Not giving up is possibly the most important advice I can give.

Developing these habits with your baby creates a sweetly shared bond while breaking out of societal/parenting norms is exactly the medicine needed in building a more progressive society.

No matter where your journey takes you, enjoy the journey and be a part of making the journey for others enjoyable.

With all my love,

♥~This Gal

Yogurt and Granola

It's kinda grey today. I was hoping for rain, just because, but none yet.

It's ok. They will surely come. There's news of a storm brewing down south.

Last night as he and I were preparing to drift off to sleep I asked him a question I've asked him many times before:

"Hey hon, what are you dreams, hopes and fears?"

He said he dreamed to watch our kids grow while growing old with me.

Perfect, I thought.

His hopes were the same and when I asked him his fears he said he didn't have any.

I thought that was beautiful and I agreed with him. For I too, didn't seem to feel any fear.

Which reminded me that I've been feeling really good lately. I'm in love with my family. We take care of one another and have each other's back. Nothing compares to the feeling of knowing you are exactly where you are meant to be with exactly the people you are meant to be with.

I love it.

Negativity: stay away from me!!

When in conversations with family members I begin to notice a pattern. Negativity. Someone wants to talk about someone else...how bad they're doing, noting a change in their voices towards sadness when doing so, I begin to wander off in my mind--wanting the subject to change, wanting to scream and run away. I also notice how these conversations have a lasting effect on me. I get all down and dumpy and wonder what they're saying about ME since they enjoy criticizing others so much--then comes the over-self-analyzing. Picking out everything that could possibly suck about me--being relentless on my journey of ripping myself to shreds.

I don't want to be this way!!

So from here on out I'm going to be more conscious of it--negativity. I'm going to put my hand up to it---and ask it to kindly stop.

My choice is simple....

happiness.