When in conversations with family members I begin to notice a pattern. Negativity. Someone wants to talk about someone else...how bad they're doing, noting a change in their voices towards sadness when doing so, I begin to wander off in my mind--wanting the subject to change, wanting to scream and run away. I also notice how these conversations have a lasting effect on me. I get all down and dumpy and wonder what they're saying about ME since they enjoy criticizing others so much--then comes the over-self-analyzing. Picking out everything that could possibly suck about me--being relentless on my journey of ripping myself to shreds.
I don't want to be this way!!
So from here on out I'm going to be more conscious of it--negativity. I'm going to put my hand up to it---and ask it to kindly stop.